A freaky foreboding (Cirque Du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant - Spanking fanfiction) / Welcome to Freakyland / As subtle as a cannonball

Damn it...he never thought it would hurt that much to see his family and friends in pain. To see his little sister cry her eyes out, hoping he didn't suffer too much at the moment of his death. He had seen them once, at the theater and under deadly danger, between Morlough and Mr Tiny's filthy claws. Fortunately, their memories had been partially erased, so they wouldn't keep any traumatic images in the back of their heads. But there was something missing. The boy could feel it.

Octa's favorite activity was to steal the stick/ball/frisbee from the poor wolf man and run like hell on her eight hairy legs, escaping from the gentle beast. When the wolf man finally caught her, he rolled and ended up facing the sky, exposing his belly for Octa to run over it, tickling him in the process.
Fortunately, not all items on said piece of furniture were candidates to be flung around; if that were the case, things would have been even messier. Not that it was noticeable, anyway, since Harkat and his friends happily crawled under the table to pick up the scraps, most of them dropped by the Wolf Man, of course.
Truska cupped his cheek in one hand and sweetly kissed his lips.
The old vampire possessed the peculiarity of generally appearing to be calm even when things weren't right, and Darren sensed his tutor might have been upset even if he didn't show it. Yeah, the kid was kinda paranoid.
The raven haired woman looked at the boy.
I've been a huge fan of "Cirque Du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant" ( 2009 movie) since the first time I watched it. I adore the characters of Madam Truska and Darren Shan, and I wish we could see more of them. I didn't read the books, I only read some fanfictions involving Larten and Madam T adopting Darren and, since I like writing fanfictions related to spanking, I thought I might give it a try. This is just me trying to write a cute/funny/intense fanfic regarding what I imagine could be their relationship as a family. Reviews are enormously appreciated!
Notes:
I chose to rate this fanfiction as "Mature" because of the spanking thing even though it is purely disciplinary, not erotic.
Notes:
Thank you, JaseekaDarkblade, for that nice comment, it really helped a lot.
Hope this is somehow enjoyable for anyone who reads it even if it took me two years to update! XD
Hugs, and thank you for staying around.

When Darren looked back it almost seemed unreal that one entire month had gone by since his petition to join the Cirque was (mostly) accepted. Few people had had the nerve to not raise their hands, since Darren had helped with several daily chores and grown very close to most of the members of the peculiar collective. Many of them, obviously including Evra and Rebeca, already considered him as one of them even before he seriously considered becoming an official "freak". He was a half vampire, but that still made him a vampire, a supernatural being with uncommon powers, an apprentice under the guidance of one of the oldest and strongest of his kind: Larten Crepsley, who had, by the way, recently married Madam Truska. FINALLY.

 

The ceremony took place within the extents of the freak camp and was officiated by Mr Tall himself. Every single freak attended the wedding, as expected. Octa delivered the rings to the happy couple; Darren had spent an entire evening trying to teach the wolf man how to gently drop flowers down the aisle without eating them as salad. Even Rhamus Twobellies had a hard time fighting his crocodile tears when Mr T concluded with the so-well-known "you may now kiss", to which Larten and Madam Truska responded almost in the act, the latter growing a beard out of full genuine happiness. That moment was immortalized and the picture was framed, now finding its place on a simple but elegant oak table at the entrance of the newlywed's tent, where Darren spent more time than he cared to admit. Evra was still sort of an older brother to him and he would always be, but it seemed to be that the young half vampire felt the call in his blood, literally. After all, Larten's blood actually ran in his veins since the night of the ritual. The night Darren had selflessly agreed to sacrifice himself to save his former best friend Steve from the hands of death. The night his life had changed forever with his transformation.

 

 

Back then, he had no idea what that implied. Being a vampire's apprentice didn't sound so hard, to be honest. He could still wander around under plain daylight, right?

 

 

Back at school, he had learned that energy didn't just "die", it couldn't be created or destructed, only transformed. Likewise, he, as a sensitive young man, felt emotions worked in a similar way. He had grown so close to his family that he couldn't just "forget it". As awful and improbable as it might sound, his subconscious mind was desperately trying to "replace" in some way what he had lost. He had always been Mr Goody Two Shoes. Even though he sometimes got into trouble, it only took a good reasonable scolding to keep him in line. Or sometimes not even that. He was a good boy. A mama's boy, so to speak. And he didn't pride himself on it, but neither did he deny it. Sometimes the word "mama" even slipped out of his lips when he was around the extravagant bearded lady. Sometimes he noticed, sometimes he didn't. Either way, Madam Truska never held objection against those "mistakes", she kind of liked it when it happened, it didn't feel forced or unreal at all. He was a family kind of person, and that was his biggest weakness and strength.

 

 

Darren Shan was known for being humble...most of the time, at least. He had what he needed and he was grateful for it, he didn't ask for too much. Yes, his parents were strict with him and had certain expectations because they wanted what they thought was best for him: college, job, family. College, job, family. COLLEGE, JOB, FAMILY. His father had made that message quite clear by yelling it a gazillion times when Darren got into occasional trouble with his best friend. Ex best friend.

 

 

Now everything was gone. Steve was under the direct influence of vampaneze and subjugated to that damn pale-as-a-ghost fat man. For the sake of his biological family, Darren couldn't afford being seen by any of them. Now, the cirque was his family. Now he felt he needed more...if only not to go insane. More, if it was possible. He needed to formalize the bonds with his new family. The question was "how?".

 

 

Despite his usual anger management issues, Larten was kind to him. A fierce guardian and a restless teacher, but always a caretaker, whether he liked it or not. Darren even missed his sarcasm when he wasn't around and he accidentally started using some of his phrases and expressions, which made Madam Truska laugh and Octa roll her eight tiny eyes. As for the bearded lady...at the beginning she had her concerns. Her forebodings had shown some alarming images since the first time she came across the teenager. Anyway, in the end everything turned out fine, but as a woman who always wanted to have children and was considered both a mother figure and an authority in the Cirque she couldn't stop "worrying" about the youngest members' wellbeing. Evra, Rebeca, and Darren...but mostly Darren. Larten, as a vampire, couldn't procreate babies. Madam Truska could. But they weren't candidates to adopt in the "normal" world and they belonged only to each other. For eternity. Crepsley had mourned every single time he lost someone. Someone human/mortal, that is. He had already lost one family...his wife and a little girl who was the light of his eyes centuries ago. He couldn't lose more. He didn't want to. Madam Truska had taught him over time to love intensely, without fears, living in the present. And now, life had something bigger prepared for them.

 

 

As every day, Darren was playing with Octa. They had become the most unusual and adorkable playmates, he even seemed younger when he allowed himself to play with her. They played chess, tic-tac-toe, tourist, cards, hide and seek, dominoes, backgammon, and began practicing some magic tricks whenever they had free time. Larten was afraid he might have accidentally snatched Darren's "innocence/childhood" away. But every time the vampire and his wife watched the boy and the giant spider play, Crepsley couldn't help but sigh in relief. Unbeknownst to him, Madam Truska was plotting something that might soothe some of his regret, but she wanted to talk to Darren first. Although that seemed rather difficult now that the kid was playing fetch with the wolf man while Evra and Rebeca were cleaning his/its den. A bit of an unpleasant task, but they had already mastered it.

 

 

It was a calm Monday afternoon. Madam Truska was sitting on a rocking chair outside the front of her tent, reading some weird Romanian edition of Ripley's "Believe it or not", smiling every now and then. Before her, just a few meters away, Darren had finished playing with his furry friends (eight-legged and four-legged) and headed back to the outdoors table at the porch to drink some water.

 

- Weird people growing horns on the back of their heads, Madam T? –the teenager asked as he drank a few sips from his glass.-

- Hm? Oh, no. Only a few animals growing two heads and things like that... -the woman said, distractedly changing the page before looking up at Darren.-

- Any two-headed spiders? Sixteen eyes on the same creature would be the weirdest thing I've seen so far, and that's a lot to say –the boy lightly joked as he put down the empty glass and walked around the chair to stand beside it and have a look at the peculiar magazine.-

- Not yet –answered Madam Truska, laughing-. But I'll let you know if I ever come across an article regarding that subject. I'll let you read it before Harkat attempts to eat the magazine, I promise –she shook her head and sighed a few moments later, lowering her sight again-. There's something I'd like to talk about, Darr-

- By the way, Madam T –he accidentally interrupted-. Oh...sorry.

- No, no –she conceded with a nervous smile-. It's alright. You wanted to say something?

- After you –he awkwardly laughed.-

 

It seemed both of them chose the exact same moment to talk about a specific topic. Luckily or unfortunately, Evra appeared, all sweaty and with a tired look on his face, smiling, nevertheless.

 

- Hey, vampirella. Hi, Madam Truska –he "politely" saluted before taking Darren's former glass to drink some water-. Wolf man's den is squeaky clean now...kind of.

- Cool. Uhm...I-I'll be there, just a sec –Darren said, nervously, glancing between the lady and the snake boy-. I'll get a slice of ham for the wolf man and we'll be right there.

- K. See ya...bye, Mrs T Rex –SORRY, Mrs T! –Evra quickly corrected and ran back to where he was working with the monkey girl.-

- So...uhm...you-you were saying? –Darren turned his attention back to Madam Truska.-

- Oh, never mind, dear, it can wait –she shook her head.-

- No, no, go on. Tell me –he insisted, rather intrigued by what the bearded woman had to say, it sounded like it was something important.-

- Daaaaarryyyyyyy!! –a well-known, intentionally annoying voice called from behind one of the tents.-

- Damn it... -Darren sighed, hanging his head for a moment before looking at the woman before him with a silent apology in his eyes-. Evra...he'll keep buggin' me if I don't go back now. Sorry, Madam T. Later, maybe? –he almost pleaded.-

 

That simple gesture made the raven-haired woman smile broadly.

 

- Don't apologize, kid. It's okay. Go, we'll talk about it after supper –she gently said, grabbing Darren's hand to lightly squeeze it-. You might wanna hurry, though, seems like the wolf man's hungry –she gestured towards the hairy beast, who was now chewing on the nearest tree.-

- Wha- HEY! –Darren yelled-. Oy! Meat head, stop that! –he half-scolded, trying not to laugh.-

 

Since the quadruped didn't seem to have listened, Darren ran to him, leaving Madam T laughing at the sight and thinking about the best way to talk about that teeny-tiny-small pending detail with the teenage vampire. Would he freak out if he knew she wanted to adopt him? She had been observing him. She had genuinely been worried whenever Evra told her about Darren's night terrors. She wished there was something else she could do, and she felt there was. She knew there was. Caring as she was, it only felt natural to take the young one under her wing.

Would Larten think she had completely lost it if he knew what she was up to?

PART 2:

And boy did dinner turn out to be...interesting, to say the least. Instead of a nice, calm evening, the meal took place, like most times, at the giant table in the dining area of the camp.

 

"Pass me the bread!" followed by "Coming atcha!" could be heard, among other phrases, seconds before spotting a flying toast or a roasted piece of chicken make its way from one end of the table to the other.

 

And there, in the middle of what resembled a food fight scene from a movie, was Madame Truska, making up her mind, trying to find the correct words to formally let Darren know she genuinely cared for him and wanted to adopt him. Needless to say, a conversation took place between Truska and Larten at their tent just minutes before dinner.

 

 

- Are you sure, my love?

- Like heck I am, Larten, I've thought about it for months. Why would I not be?

- Because, well...I mean, we are already a family. A big, fat, crazy, chaotic, freaky family...is it necessary to make it "official"? –the vampire asked, emphasizing "necessary" and "official".-

 

Madame T raised a single brow.

 

- Don't get me wrong, dear. The boy is finally free, no ties, no unnecessary commitments...what if he feels we are trying to "control" him? He's got a whole world to discover...

- And we are not stopping him from doing it –she cut in.-

 

Larten sighed and lovingly looked into his wife's deep, dark, chocolaty eyes.

 

- I just don't want him to feel this is "too much" or that we are trying to impose too many rules on him...it was already a lot to take in with the vampiric transformation alone, he went through enough repression with his parents, and –he held her hands kindly, almost desperately- ...last thing I want is a teenage apprentice pushing us away because he thinks his vampire mentor is overbearing. I cannot let that boy get anywhere near Mr Tiny's filthy claws...I couldn't. I don't want to lose him. I don't want to get too close because I don't want him to back away.

- Larten Crepsley...is that fear I sense in your voice?

 

The man could only smile, emotion clouding his somewhat sad gaze. It was clear he cared a lot what Darren thought and felt towards him, both as a mentor and as the parental figure he had accidentally become.

 

- He will not –she reassured him.-

 

A several-hundred-years-old vampire would have normally seen and gone through everything, thus, would seldom be "bothered" by issues pertaining to the mortal world or the spectrum of emotions. But old, grumpy Larten openly expressing or admitting he was afraid was something not often seen.

 

- He never asked us to take this step, you know –he mumbled-. What if he...?

 

"Rejects us" is what he was going to ask, but a delicate index finger sealed his lips in no time.

 

- Even if that was remotely possible, it wouldn't mean he does not need or want us, sweetheart –she smiled, making his insecurities start to fade away-. I'll be subtle.

- Alright –he finally conceded-. I know I have no chances fighting you –he jokingly added.-

- Oh, you make me sound so mean! –she lightly slapped his shoulder.-

- I know you. Once you make up your mind, there's no way of stopping you, woman –he raised his arms in mock defeat.-

- You think I would proceed even if you did not agree?! –she asked, smiling, pretending to be "offended".-

- ... Would you, in this case? –he asked, wrapping her in a warm hug.-

- Mmm...I think I would –she teased.-

- What?! –he pulled back a few inches just to see her face, surprised.-

- I most probably would, this really means that much to me, but I can't deny how much I care about your opinion regarding this particular issue –she confessed, now sounding a bit more serious.-

- I... I do. I want... For Nosferatu's sake, you make me want to do the most insane things –he admitted.-

- So now it's me? –Truska's beard threatened to come out.-

- And I wouldn't have it any other way –he softly caressed her chin with the back of his hand, lowering his voice tone in a shy/romantic way-. I must say I'm freaking the hell out, mon amour... Do you really think we are cut out to be...parents?

 

 

The word itself sent shivers down his spine. There was not one thing on heaven, hell or earth that he wanted more than to have a family of his own...and not one thing that scared him more than that, as well. He dreaded the simple thought of losing another family, and that was what always kept him back.

After a few seconds, Truska slowly nodded, softly smiling. She knew every inch of her kranky soulmate, so his lack of eloquence was no secret to her. He felt he sucked at being gentle and sensitive, but he appreciated the teenager way more than he cared to admit.

 

 

- I know my forebodings kept me skeptical at the beginning, but I trust we will figure things out on the way...together. It's Darren we're talking about, lyubov, how hard can it be? He's basically a vampire version of "Ferdinand The Bull".

- I love your weird human metaphors –he said, gently leaning in to kiss her neck, making her beard grow a few millimeters.-

- Oh, you know I'm head over heels for you, you old bat –she said in a soft, cheesy, provocative voice.-

- DINNER'S READY! COME AND GET IT, YA BUNCH OF FREAKSTERS! –Rhamus yelled from the cooking tent, making Crepsley roll his eyes.-

- We'd better get going –Truska stated, laughing-. We'll be fine...it'll be fine –she pecked him on the lips and held his hand to head out of their tent-. I told Darren we could talk after dinner.

- Satan help me –Larten jokingly smiled-. I trust you with my life, my sweet love...better said, my "not life" –he added, kissing her back-. Let's go and hope Rhamus didn't cook roasted car tires for dinner...again.

 

 

- Pass me the garlic dip, Mr Crêpe? Sorry, Crepsley...? –Evra cleared his throat.-

- Now that's just rude, Snake Boy –Larten scolded, nevertheless reaching for the small bowl and handing it over to Madame Truska, who "apologetically" stretched her arm in front of Darren and Rebecca in order to give it to Evra.-

- The garlic dip or the crêpe thing? –the green-skinned asked.-

- Both –the vampire dryly stated-. Luckily for you, reptile blood is not included in my diet and I do not support cannibalism –he added, grumbling.-

- Awww. So you're admitting we're family after all? –the snake boy teased, carelessly spreading a generous amount of dip on a piece of...well, whatever snake people "normally" ate.-

 

Larten rolled his eyes and changed his voice tone as he addressed his protégé.

 

- So, Darren...care to have a word with us after dinner? –was all he clumsily managed to say; "discretion" was not precisely his middle name.-

 

"Us"? Darren kept in mind he had a pending conversation with Madame Truska, but Crepsley? What had he done now? What would his mentor want to talk about now?! I mean, yes, Darren might have wandered off during the week just to make sure his younger human sister was not being bullied at school, but it was only once. Was Crepsley mad about it? Had he noticed he'd gone missing for a while that day?

 

- Uhm, yes, I... I guess –he said, scratching the back of his head, trying to dissimulate his nervousness-. Everything alright?

 

"Am I in trouble?" was what he wanted to know, but he bit his tongue because it'd be too obvious he'd done something suspicious. Truska looked at Larten curiously.

 

- Yes, everything is fine –Larten distractedly said, looking at Octa as he fed her some fruit flies for dessert.-

 

Truska cluelessly looking at Crepsley and Larten being awful at communicating and establishing eye contact sent Darren the wrong message.

 

- Look, I'm sorry, I just...it was only once –Darren abruptly said.-

 

Evra and Rebecca awkwardly looked at each other, trying to make it seem as if they were minding their own business.

 

- No, wait, Darren, It's not about... -she trailed off looking at her husband once more. Was there another topic he wanted to address with the teenager? He couldn't be talking about the adoption...or could he?.-

 

 

Whatever it was, Truska was not succeeding at trying to discretely get Larten's attention. Weren't they going to wait until after dinner to freely mention their intentions? It was hard to know, since the redhead was absentmindedly looking at their giant pet spider and had failed to notice he had accidentally set Darren off into an alert mode by making an important choice of words at the wrong time. Being secretly excited over something clearly made him nervous...and a bit dumb. Apparently one freaking normal dinner was too much to ask for at the camp.

 

 

- I just needed to make sure my... -Darren interrupted himself as soon as Crepsley laid eyes on him, blood glass in hand.-

- Kid, relax. What are you talking ab-

- Please don't be mad at me, I swear I didn't mean to do any harm –he quickly started rambling, making no sense at all for the other freaks at the table. He couldn't afford to lose another set of parents...or parental figures whatsoever.-

- What? No, Darren, just-

 

 

What the actual heck?! The Bearded Lady found herself, from one moment to the other, frantically alternating her sight between Darren and Larten, who apparently couldn't keep it shut until after they were done dining and was now spoiling the whole "smooth adoption process" thing. Now it was too late for Larten to take his words back. Even if she didn't plan on doing it, she would have to speak up sooner than she thought. Damn it, Larten! Truska couldn't risk things going wrong in such a delicate issue, so, for the sake of goodness, she stepped in to put some order just when Larten was casually taking a sip from his glass.

 

 

- Darren, would you like to be our son? –she practically "blurted out", raising her voice just enough to be heard over the two vampires' "dialogue".-

 

 

Eight words. That was all that was needed.

Rebecca stopped chewing, Evra dropped a bread loaf into his bowl of mushroom soup, Octa choked on a fly, Larten spat out his drink on the poor spider, and Darren accidentally drove a steak knife through the wooden table while attempting to cut a piece of raw meat.

 

Subtle.

Simple.

Ah... Home, sweet, freaky home!

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THIS STORY MIGHT CONTAIN SPANKING; DON'T LIKE, DON'T READ.

I own none of the credits.

This story is available on Wattpad, also written by me.

Crepsley and Madame T finally ask Darren the big question...sorta.

So...took me a gazillion years to update one of my stories, I was the victim of a writer's block for months, but receiving a positive comment on chapter 1 kinda cheered me up to try and write a little something. Short and weird, but here it goes.

So...hope it wasn't that bad(?)

All of my stories are also available on Wattpad under my same username.

Feedback is well received and enormously appreciated!